Chanel polishes are a cruel mistress. They look so alluring in their neat little bottle, so glossy, so pretty, so different. But as soon as I try to slick them on, they turn on me, pointing out all my nail insecurities, shimmer glinting sacastically. "You have manky cuticles!" they snigger. "There's weird ridges everywhere! How do you even get polish in your ear, you klutz?!" They pick up on every bump and dip on my poor nails and cling to them in the most unflattering way possible. Then being their bad smudgey selves, they refuse to dry, leave bald patches even after three coats and chip more than the Gobbledegook (bonus points if you were scared of that thing). Admitedly I'm not the sharpest crayon in the cookie jar with nailpolish, and my handiwork is shaky, but I think Chanel needs to work on their thin formulas and match performance to the otherwise fab in-the-bottle palettes.
|Ignore the scrungy nails, just look at what technically should be a good colour|
I wanted to love June so hard, but June didn't love me. It's a creamy orange, quite sheer and surprisingly without much of that shimmer previous Chanel pastels have boasted. Sucks to pay $39 for a shade that honestly was done better by Sportsgirl last year. I've been wearing it for less than 24 hours and it's worn off the tips and edges.
The only thing keeping my faith in the Le Vernis line is the amazing Black Pearl, Graphite, Dragon and my favourite, Peridot shades, all dark and some metallic. I'll be avoiding pale colours from the interlocked Cs from now on, after the disappointing June and earlier, Mimosa (flooded my cuticles, zero staying-power) and Minstrel (boring shade and streaky). I love everything else you do, Chanel, so why can't you get this right? Don't make me set Tom Ford on you!